Ok, I think you get the point. I am feeling sneaky, rebellious, and rather pathetic now. For years I have wanted a Golden Lab Retriever, my dream pet. I was raised with one and a part of me feels that my children need to have one in order to have as perfect a childhood as I had. Alas, we have always rented rather small places and Labs are not meant for small places. I still want my kids to have the "pet experience". I am even willing to suffer stinky snake cages, lost hamsters in my couch, tipped over aquariums, almost anything for the sake of giving my kids that "experience", but I have something else, besides small rentals, that has stopped me from getting any of these pets. This other thing is my very awesome husband. He HATES the thought of pets. He loves animals, and he will get on the floor and play with your pet for hours on end, he just doesn't want animal hair or animal smell where we live (sniff sniff). To be fair, that man has survived some rather gruesome pet hair, and pet pee experiences while on a mission in PA. I've promised him that I will respect this as long as we live in rentals, but as soon as we buy a house there will magically appear a stray, full blooded, Golden Lab Retriever in our back yard. I can't be held responsible if the kids see this stray mutt sitting in our back yard, or if they happen to feed it, or even if they happen to fall in love with it and give it a name before he comes home from work. Until that day comes, though, I am sadly pet-less. Well, no longer! If I can't buy myself a pet then I will grow one. And that is just what I have done, and I've grown quite a lot of them, too. They don't take up much space, just a jar in my fridge. They eat very cheap pet food, just flour and water. No need to potty train them because they defecate right in their little jar. And we get to eat them too. Oh, and I've named them all Herman.
You've either guessed my dirty little pet secret, or you are thinking I'm mad. What I've done is grow my very own sourdough starter. I mixed equal parts flour and water in a glass bowl, covered it with a tea towel, and let it sit on my counter for 5 days. I fed it 1/2 C. flour and 1/2 C. water every 24 hours and gave it a stir. It filled itself with lovely little bubbles and gave of the most deliciously sour smell after about the 3rd day. On the 5th day I put half of the sourdough start in a jar in my fridge, where I will only have to feed it once a week. The other half I used to make 3 delicious, round, crusty loaves of tomato sourdough bread. I was raised on sourdough and I love the stuff. So, now I have my pet, my sourdough bread, a full tummy, and a smile on my face =)
Oh, and if any of you know of someone who is just giving away golden lab retrievers, would you mysteriously drop one off in my backyard early in the morning? Thanks!