Today I will tell you how I get my picky kids to eat green beans. I don't know why this only seems to work with green beans but it works like a charm. I must warn you, it is demented, very disturbing, and still makes me wince that my kids like it so much.
We kill our green beans in a tortuous, graphic, and very loud way. We eat them to death. It all starts with the pile of quietly uneaten green beans. I take notice and start my pleading-bribing-threatening routine. "Please? Just eat 5 of them for mommy. It will make me so happy to see you putting those wonderful vitamins in your body. Don't you want to be big and strong with super muscles like daddy? We'll make cookies after dinner if you can eat them all gone. Tell you what, I will pay you a penny for every green bean you eat. Tell you what, I will spank you for every green bean you don't eat!" Once I get to threatening my child over a green bean I realize that I need to think outside the box, and once again I fall back on this fail proof routine:
I salt their green beans, hold one up in front of the child's mouth, make it wiggle a little, and in a very high pitched voice say,
"Oh no, no, please don't eat me! Don't bite my head of off, oh please no!"
The kid promptly gets an evil smile on their face and chomps the poor guy's head off. Now comes a step that can't be left out or all they will eat is the head of every green bean. Now you must have the head scream in their mouth as they chew (don't forget to make it sound muffled as it is coming from inside the mouth).
"Ow, my head, ow. Oh no! Please don't bite my legs! Owie ow ow not my legs!"
To which the devil child will happily munch away at more of the poor, dying Mr. Green Bean. Keep going till you get all the way down to the toes and in they go.
Sadly you must sit there, hand feeding each and every green bean into their mouth, making horrific dying sounds, and feeling queasy, in order for them to eat all their green beans. The good news is that after they get a bit older you can just say: I know you can eat them so eat them.
And that, my friends, is how I've gotten all my kids to eat green beans. I may need therapy for it later, though.