Mmmmmm, eggs. So tasty and useful in so many ways. How do I love thee eggs? Let me count the ways:
1. Pouched in Eggs Benedict.
2. Fried in the middle of a piece of toast.
4. Creamy in my Creme Brulee
5. Baked in my delicate White Chocolate Raspberry Truffle cheesecake that I ate just 4 hours ago while visiting with my wonderful friend, An Ordinary Mom.
6. Holding my herbed bread crumbs onto my tender chicken breasts.
7. Separated for Angel Food cake and rice pudding.
8. Crushed shells fertilizing my plants.
9. Hollow shells filled with confetti for a practical joke.
10. Raw, passing from spoon to spoon in a relay race.
How do I not like thee? Let me count the ways:
1. Dripping all over the back of my car when my daughter steps on your carton (no, she should not have been back there).
2. Broken on my floor because I tried to carry four of you in one hand.
3. Broken on my walls because my boys thought you would be a great baseball.
4. Rotten because I hid you in my closet and forgot about you when I was 6.
5. Sticky, crushed shells all over my carpet because Sweet Terror took you out of the garbage to play.
6. BUT THE WAY I DISLIKE YOU MOST IS WHEN YOU'VE BEEN THROWN AT MY HOUSE, HIGHER THAN I CAN POSSIBLY REACH, ABOVE MY WINDOWS SO THAT I HAVE NASTY STICKY DRIPS THAT MAKE ME WANT TO THROW UP WHEN I OPEN MY BLINDS.
If I ever find the little rats that did this I am going to use my entire Costco size package of toilet paper on their house. I wouldn't egg them back, though, because that would just be juvenile.